Marketing and Communications Advisor

October 16, 2008 at 11:49 am Leave a comment

I arrived at work today at 10:25am.   Ben is not there so Annelies is on reception.  Annelies and Helen openly had heated words before I arrived.  Sharon let me know on sms.  Azzam and Sharon hide away in their office’s.  Ron is back and forth trying to rally everyone into the room for a staff meeting which are every Thursday, 10.30am.  We are, rightfully so, reluctant.

10:45am  We finally all stroll into the meeting room…

Ron:  “Ok Azzam, lets start with you.  What have you done this week?”

Azzam:  “This week I just finish the budget.  I also want to know why the World membership is not done?  I mean, it is not accurate and not sent.  Why is this?”

Linda:  “Well I think it is accurate, I fixed the query”

Azzam:  “No, the database is not accurate.  If I do query on how the member genders, I get wrong answers.  But World membership is not done, why not?”

Ron:  “Right – so Azzam, let’s you, Linda, Ben and me meet this afternoon to discuss.  Now, Annelies, what is happening with you?”

Annelies:  “I have been doing AccOT and when I get my computer working again, I can finish my work.”

*insert conversation about product key expiring here, with the resolution that Linda will look into getting the software onto her computer and explaining that there will be one of two outcomes; either we find a copy of MS Office 2003 and reuse the licensce, or we buy a new 2007 version with a new licence… *

Ron:  “Ok, goodo.  Sharon… ”

Sharon:   “Well I haven’t been doing much other than policy stuff…  What’s going on with the vacant position?”

Ron (awkward shuffle):   “Well it’s being managed by a recruitment company and last week they had 1500 people short list the ad and of that, it’s expected that 150 would click through to read the ad in full and maybe of them, 15 would apply.  But only about 50 clicked through to look at the ad and we have had only a few applicants.  We’ve advertised it on Seek and MyCareer twice and is in the paper this weekend…”

*insert some comments here, like maybe it’s the title or lack of salary disclosure… *

Ron:  “We have talked about the role being split up into 3 sections so that maybe we can employ 2 or 3 people part time to manage the different sections of the job…   what is that smirk for Linda?”

Linda:  “2-3 people?  that is a logistical nightmare…”

*meeting continues to this tone for a further 10 – 15 minutes…*

Ron:  “Oh I thought maybe we could have brief meetings in the morning over coffee each day”

Sharon:  “That’s an awful lot of coffee!”

Annelies:  “Don’t you think that meeting every day would cut down our time wasted?”

Sharon:  “NO!  Think about it, we just spent 45 min, and that is a short meeting.  So, what?  Are going to meet for only 9 min each day if we meet EVERY morning?  NO!… ”

11:30am – I look at Annelies’ computer and approach Ron about buying software for her computer.  A conversation follows on (much of it a repeat from what was said not 20 minutes ago… )   A group discussion occurs about buying 5 licences of MS Office 2007 for the office…  I collate some pricing from the net on this.  I don’t think this is part of my job.

11:40am – 1:20pm – I collate data from the database and query script, and financial information from Azzam, do a comparison on accuracy and financial income that should be generated.

1:20pm – I send an email to group: “Query is accurate and operating correctly.  Any inconsistencies are from the data’s source – I just have a query to extract it.  Having done a quick analysis, it seems that NSW has a huge discrepancy in their World members they pay for and those on the database.  THis is most likely due to their different membership year and their database manager.

Once NSW issue is corrected, the following can be implimented:  Ben will send monthly and forward information to make a procedure”

1:30pm  Linda to Azzam “Ok, so it’s not the database.  Can you contact NSW and see what their financial records say and you can take it from there.  This is now a finance issue and not my job.  Not that the database or World membership is my job…

1:45pm Linda to Ron:  “Have you read my email?  …   Ok, so Azzam is following up on NSW iscrepancies, I’ll follow up with Ben on the few issues…

Ron “But we need a proceedure – is there one?”

Linda “No, but now we can make one based on what is and has been done… ”

Ron, reaching for a whiteboard marker… “Ok, so the procedure will be…  ”

*insert 20 min of drawing the procedure flow chart on the white board*

Ron:  “Ok, so will you draw that up?”

Linda:  “No, it’s not my job, surely Ben or Helen can do that… ”

Ron:  “Right.  So… what do you expect will happen with the advertising in the new year (now that we getting magazine printed and bagged in Singapore, making the schedule 3 weeks longer…)?”

Linda:  “I honestly don’t know.  The increased timeline will adversely affect the sales, but maybe the layout redesign of the publication and that it will be co-mailed with the Journal adds value that I can’t measure…”

Ron:  “Right, so you don’t know”

Linda:  “No, I don’t know”

*insert here a further 60 min conversation about the magazine layout… how to approach new design… content of current issue… *

Ron:  “So in the next issue, when do you need to know if we are leaving a page for a ballot form?  *shakes head*  I’ve had emails today – you know that ballot form was incorrect…  So we’ll need to do a postal ballot…”

*insert conversation here with Linda deflecting how ballot design was NOT part of her job, and then reading with him the Constitution and what it says on how to run the election of the Councillor… *

Ron:  “Have I shown you pictures of my daughter?”

Linda:  “Not recently”

Ron, now at his PC looking through folders to show me pics of his 22ish year old in Ireland:  “There she is!”

Linda:  “Oh, nice photo…   so with this ballot form… ”

*insert another 15 minutes of conversation… *

3:20pm  I have something to eat… kinda lunch.

3:40pm – 4:00pm   I print and mail off some marketing materials in the absence of Ben. (Not my job…)

4:05pm – 4:20pm   I search for and contact computer recyclers so that the office’s broken scanner can be removed (again NOT my job…)

4:30pm – 5:10pm   I answer the phones whilst compiling an email of questions regarding the publication contract…

5:15pm   “Ron, can you please read through this email I want to send to Wiley’s regarding the contract you have signed.  It will open a can of worms on the agreed terms but it’s better to know now than find out in 4 months time… ”

*email includes questions such as “does the contract include a standard over run of 200 copies for our use?, what is the cost of inserting flyers?  what size and paper spec did you quote / contract on? etc etc etc… (NOT MY JOB!!!!!  all of this should have been sorted BEFORE anything was signed.!!!)*

Ron:  “Yep, looks good – send it.”

5:25pm   I do the office night time procedures of turning off lights, shutting windows and blinds, cleaning the kitchen…  (NOT MY JOB…  seriously… )

10:35pm  I log into my email so that I can do some of my job…

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Entry filed under: Rants. Tags: .

Profiler Half-hearted, Half-assed, and Half-baked.

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